Maybe this year will be better than the last.
I can't remember all the times I tried to tell myself
To hold on to these moments as they pass."
--lyrics of "A Long December" by Counting Crows
And so go the words sung by a beloved band from my teenage years. Decembers are long 'round here. The sun sets by 4:30 p.m. The sun begins to glint after 7 a.m. A few weeks ago after watching White Christmas, I wondered if we'd get a Christmas miracle of a cold white wonderland. It trickled into the upper valley on Christmas Eve and a few days later, BAM! I'm now living in a Vermont Christmas card.
It's been another year. It started high and ended...well, my feelings are mixed. I choose to live with faith and optimism, but the longer I live, I am exposed to more tragedy that frightens me for the innocent ones living under my protective wings. But, we all carry on. Life is still a beautiful gift. It must be cherished until the last grains of sand slip through that hour glass called mortality.
So that is where my mind is right now: I'm trying to hold and appreciate all of life's little moments as much as I can. With this being the eve of a brand new year, I feel internal strings pulling me towards the keyboard--must be coming from the reflections from the past six or so weeks. Or it comes from the inquiries from family and friends who are concerned about whether I am still alive.
Hanging by a thread over here, but yes, she has a pulse!
Fact: I haven't blogged since November.
Reality: Oh, nobody has noticed? Figures.
Fact: I'm growing a little human being.
Reality: This human being is a boy. And he ain't little. Past experience has taught me that he will be born the size of a newborn elephant.
Fact: Most people didn't know this until after I was 20 weeks along.
Reality: This leads me to wonder if others think it's normal to see me walking around with my three chins. Am I really that chubby and frumpy when I'm not pregnant? Ouch. I'll ponder on that.
Fact: To improve my repertoire in the kitchen, I took two more baking classes from King Arthur Flour.
Reality: Baking beautiful things ends when I leave the doors of KAF. I won't be posting pictures from the pie crust I made for our Thanksgiving banana cream pie--grade F for presentation, but an A+ for taste.
Fact: My little Indy had her first trip to the ED for four stitches.
Reality: She had her second trip to the ED three days later for croup.
Fact: She wanted her pink blanket to comfort her through the pain.
Reality: Pink Blanket took a back seat when Dad met up with her at the hospital.
Bonus: Emergency personnel showered her with new furry bears; the names are as follows: Baby Stitches, Fuzzy Bear, and Doctor Bear.
Fact: Dora the Explorer and Go Diego Go! are sensationally annoying.
Reality: But nothing puts a smile to my face when Finn shouts jubilantly, "Swiper no swiping! Swiper no swiping! Swiper NO swiping!" and his sister's chipmunk voice answers, "Oh, maaan!"
Fact: My two are best friends.
Reality: But they fight like siblings.
Fact: I love the season of Christmas with children.
Reality: Christmas with children is a lot of work. I was sweating like a hog anticipating any tiny sleight of hand while the kids and I admired the Hanover Inn's delicate gingerbread display.
Fact: I participated in a holiday boutique again--baby leggings, baby hats, tree ornaments, fabric notebooks, glass pebble magnets, jewelry...
Reality: I'm not cut out for this type of stuff. It's a low blow to my self esteem when passers by don't even give a sniff to my hard work. I think to myself, "not cute enough? is it junk? too pricey? fine, I'll use it myself." After so many hours spent crafting, I now appreciate people who do this type of thing for a living.
Fact: Christmas isn't Christmas without Pomegranate 7up, Pear Cinnamon Cider, and Candy Cane Joe Joe's.
Reality: For the third year in a row, I was deeply irritated to be unable to locate a trace of Pom 7up. Found a decent replacement in the Polar brand. Took care of the last two items after finding a new TJ location while Christmas shopping near the NH/MA border.
Fact: I made a fascinator hat to wear to Boy's Christmas party with his department. Good thing I can count on my stretchy LBD for these types of outings. I even went all out and bought a $4 bling ring to fancy it out. Mama looked hot.
Reality: My dressy ensemble was overshadowed by Boy's mustache that he worked so hard to grow out for two months.
Bonus: No, neither of us won the contest for "best hat" nor "best 'stache".
Extra bonus: He's clean shaven once again. Hallelujah.
[No bonus: No photo of said mustache included. I refuse. I refuse. I refuse.]
Fact: My favorite part of Christmas were the lights and nativity in Sharon, Vermont.
Reality: While my kids made friends a Palestinian donkey named Annie and admire baby Jesus for a moment, they would rather play with their new trains and doll stroller on Christmas morning.
Bonus: I realize my kids are still young to understand the meaning of Christmas...passing up my oven-baked quiche lorraine and hot butterscotch rolls to play with toys? What blasphemy!
Fact: Over the weekend, our local airport (hint: small) had tickets to fly to Boston or New York City for $12 per person. Dost my ears deceive me? Twelve? My heart fluttered for the Big Apple.
Reality: By the time we heard about this scream of a deal, all the flights were full unless you were flying solo. New Year's weekend down in Times Square wasn't meant to be.
This lengthy post doesn't guarantee a quick return to blogging, but to everyone I love--a very happy new year!
May 2013 be a good year...